Dating or some such Thing

Dating in your 30s is a whole different ball game. I guess it was easier before. At least that’s what I feel personally. I got introduced to my ex through a friend. I was with him for a whole 7 years before we decided that we weren’t meant for each other. We split up and moved on. I think we made it easier for each other when moving on because neither of us wanted to be with the other person.

After the split, I did try what everyone else was doing. Tinder and those other dating sites. And the one thing I found most common was that people didn’t want to date with the intention of taking it further. And that might work for some, but “wham, bam, thank you ma’am” isn’t really my style. Some suggested being in an open relationship. And some suggested that they would like to be friends with benefits. I never understood these concepts before and I certainly am not getting with the program now. These concepts are literally alien to me and I’d like it to stay that way. 

Sometimes I feel like the romance is just lost. So what is it that people want? “Hey! Let’s be together and pretend like we’re in a relationship. But at the same time we want to be able to see other people. You can’t be jealous if I’m on a date with someone else, but we’re still loyal to each other and have great sex, but we won’t do dates and dinners and movies. We won’t meet each others’ families but friends are okay. Let’s act like we’re married and almost live together, but if we need our space, we can stay away from each other and finally, if this isn’t going the way it’s supposed to, we can call it quits and move on because we were never in love in the first place.

Well, that’s what it seems like to me. I’m quite sure there are a lot of benefits to being in this sort of relationship, but I just don’t see the point. I don’t understand it and I don’t care to. I suppose I’m a tad old-school. If you’re with someone, be with them. Fall in love, go on dates, spend time with each other, invest emotionally and be in it whole heartedly. Don’t like it, break up and move on. It seems quite half hearted otherwise. 

I want the whole deal, I guess. Considering I felt like I was cheated out of it before. I want flowers and cuddles and forehead kisses and a man who’ll say my most favourite words, “I’ll do the dishes.” 

But perhaps because I’m a tad older than 20, I’m a bit more set in my ways and it’s difficult to look at things from a different point of view than what others can do with ease. 

In any case, I’ve currently put a hold on this dating business. For now I’m content with my life. Life’s good. 

Chai Time

So, I have this routine in the morning. I take the pup for a walk, run a little, make breakfast and then finally, I make my hot lemon tea and sit in my balcony. 

This tea time, is a special time for me. Rarely do I invite anyone to chill with me on a workday when I’m having my tea. If you’ve been allowed to do so, consider yourself extremely lucky. 

Before the hustle and bustle of the day begins with work and the stress and all that, I take 20 minutes. That’s it. Those 20 minutes are mine. I sit with my tea, in my balcony and enjoy some quality time with myself. I have great conversations with myself too. It’s the only time I think out loud and there’s really no one around to judge. Sometimes I read, sometimes I listen to music and sometimes I just sit on the balcony floor with my puppy and pet him. It’s a calming process for me. The jumble that has taken place the previous night and the brain-drain of the day moving forward, is turned down a notch or two, just by sipping some tea and relaxing my mind. 

It’s almost imperative that I do this every day. I don’t really need a jolt to start the day. What I crave is peace of mind before the day begins. 

Oh, how I love chai time. 😍